Coronavirus

We are looking into tinfoil nanotubes...

 

They're shutting all the pubs now in the UK, I tried going in with my tinfoil hat on and they turned me away, I'm annoyed...and very thirsty.

 

I have alerted our lobbyists and friends in government. There should be an exception for people who are wearing my tinfoil hats and, therefore, cannot have a Covid-19 infection (100% proven success rate.) In fact, I am diverting our government liaison office away from their current focus on the whiners who complain about a tinfoil hat suddenly bursting into flames and causing them to lose their scalp, or an ear, or part of their jaw. Big babies. And to the guy that lost an eye: you still have one left, you wuss. And don't get me started on the girly-men who are bleeding out of their ears... We will put those noble efforts on temporary hold and focus our attention on advocating for political legislation to keep all food and beverage establishments open for those who have chosen to not take part in the pandemic by wisely choosing to use my tinfoil hats, instead.

 

The worst complainers were that group of 34 cry babies that all exploded simultaneously at that tinfoil hat sale last week. I mean if you are going to wear the tinfoil hats during a lightning storm, then expect to explode! Don't people understand the concept of lightning rods?.....Like duh!!!!!

 

This has become the most crucial situation for the world now we all must do care about it.

 

Note, that one report said that there were only 32 spontaneous explosions, so it not as bad as people are thinking. Wearing a tinfoil hat in a lightning storm without our special Lightning Prevention Adapter voids all warranties, of course.

 

If you find a need for more production space maybe you could give the airlines some support. They have a lot of parked planes right now that you could lease for your excess manufacturing needs.

 

I tried drinking boil water and now I have boils on my tongue, what should I do now?

 

Sit down, spread your legs, put your head between your legs, and kiss your - oh, wait, I'm sorry - I think that's for an atom bomb...

 

Fake news are now exploiting this story and are running with it, latest "news" story is that 35 exploded. People don't read the instructions and are exploding with monotonous regularity, like the old guy down the street. He got hit by lighting wearing his tinfoil hat. All the paramedics found after the event were his boots and the tinfoil hat which still worked!

What this proves is that like a Timex watch, your tinfoil hats can take a lickin' and keep on tickin'.

 

I like that. Durability. More value in a product that has durability.

That made me think of time bombs. And all this talk about explosions? This might make the fake news pundits snicker with glee.

 

Two day curfew here in Sri Lanka till Monday morning. Food is running low in me fridge- all I got is chicken eggs and pasta.
Thank god I bought the PS4 and Uncharted 4.

 

Thank goodness that you did not drink hemorrhoid water...

Licking a tinfoil hat voids the warranty, of course.

And, don't forget that it is dual purpose in terms of baking potatoes.

Will keep that in mind. Also been in discussions with the National Guard since they are being activated all over the place.

 

Are we to understand from the above quote that the multi purpose tinfoil hats do not cure hemorrhoids?

 

Not with our off the shelf hats. Our custom tinfoil hat division has experience with that type of hat, but it is a special order. The good news is that design also prevents appendicitis.

 

Yes I've heard about your custom hats. In fact the old guy down the street who got blown up by a lightning strike was wearing your Viagra model at the time.

 

While you are staying at homes try to listen quality music. This video had uplifting effect on me.

 

Great way to go out!

 

^^^Yet another testimonial from a satisfied customer for your Viagra model tinfoil hat.

 

That must've been an interesting sight.