Funny dog stories...Anyone else?

The crazy animal in my Avatar is the subject of this post. Female Rottie that is nuts!!

She is 6 years old. I rescued her from an animal rescue kennel when she was 1. She was going to be euthanized, I learned after the fact. She had gone out of 5 different adoptions and came back to the kennel SAME DAY each time for showing her teeth.

I knew this when I adopted her but what the heck I am an experienced dog handler (rotties mainly) and felt I could deal with it.

She immediately loved me and NEVER showed her teeth to me, but my friends and children were a different story. I felt this behavior was beyond me so I called in and animal communicator. Over the next 3 months ($1000) She came around and stopped growling and showing her teeth. Over time this dog has proven her loyalty to me, my family and friends. She has learned to sing country music with daddy, is very friendly now, very obedient...just a great dog.

However, there is one thing that she persists with, SQIRRELS! Her prey drive is out of control. She can't control herself when she sees one. In my backyard I have 2 big trees where the squirrels hang out. Shadow has learned to walk on her hind legs so she can see every movement these little basterds make. It looks ridiculously hilarious: D. My buddies and I laugh for hours over this deranged behavior.

The other day I noticed Shadow doing her regular two legged patrol while eyeballing a certain squirrel! She talks to them and kindly asks them to come down and play with her. It finally happened; one of them lost their footing, fell to the ground and landed within inches of Shadow. There was a fraction of a second of hesitation, both wondering what's next . Then the chase began. The squirrel made it to the fence and got 90% clear of the raging rottie. The only thing left on her side of the fence was the tail. Shadow bit the tail and stripped in right down to skin. Thank god the poor little bugger got away! The only thing left on my side of the fence was what appeared to be a part of a Daniel Boone hat while the squirrel continued running up a hill STRIPPED of the hair on his tail. Occasionally I see the same sqirrel marked by a hairless tail and can't help but laugh my fool head off .

I am pretty sure that Shadow, after 5 years of hoping, talking and preying to these guys was in her glory .

Anyone else have a funny cannine experience to share with us?

 

Our dog is definitely lesbian. She loves sniffing punani and poking at girls boobs with her nose.

I've done nothing to discourage this behavior as I too am a lesbian (trapped in a man's body) and completely understand.

 

I had a dog that would drink milk out of my mouth.

 

Well this isn't funny. My dog has Gay tendencies! He humped another male dog the other day. and spent 10 minutes with his head up it's arse, and then licked it's dick!

Also he sits on the carpet, and sort of shuffles along on his arse and gets an erection whilst he's doing it. What le fuck..?

He is only a baby aswell, *Tuts* dogs nowadays are too oversexed..!!

 

Do worry about it Mella, all dogs are gay. Ever notice when dogs first meet they go for the gentiles as if it's a handshake . Can you imagine if us humans behaved this way on every introduction .

Shadow eats peanuts from my mouth.

Dominic, are you sure this isn't a result of your training ?

 

My dog trims it's own toe nails. She is a lab, but probably has a little bit of border collie in her. I also just taught her to jump through a hoop

 

A boxer dog of mine made a cat stay up a tree for 4 nights and 3 days. We couldn't get the cat to come down and get out of our garden even with the dog (Maxi) being locked away.

Eventually this agile little fella managed to bravely push him off a branch.

That cat used to walk across our back garden but we never saw him again...

 

That's only Jewish dogs...

Also, I'm pretty certain that PITA considers getting dogs to sing country music is cruelty to animals.

 

New Dog Breeds

Collie + Lhasa Apso
Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport

Spitz + Chow Chow
Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot

Pointer + Setter
Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

Great Pyrenees + Dachshund
Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso
Peekasso, an abstract dog

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel
Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever
Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists

Newfoundland + Basset Hound
Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors

Terrier + Bulldog
Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes

Bloodhound + Labrador
Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly

Malamute + Pointer
Moot Point, owned by....oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway

Collie + Malamute
Commute, a dog that travels to work

Deerhound + Terrier
Derriere, a dog that's true to the end (Mella has one of these)

 

My buddy had a Ridgeback a while back. I went with him to the breeder to pick her up. First, I didn't want to get out of the car. Five ridgebacks at the gate were enough for me to want to chicken out. Eventually I was pried out of the car.

I went in to the kennel, where I was introduced to Zeus - the stud. Beautiful dog. The size of a horse. Twice as big as any other dog there, with teeth the size of my fingers and a head bigger than mine. Zeus and I got left alone, so he showed me his bitches. They were in three separate cages, and he communicated to me that he wanted in. Amazingly there was no confusion in his communication. He was real matter of fact about it. "They belong to me. I want in." is pretty much what I got out of his body language. He walked to me, nudged my hand, walked over to one of the gates and nudged the lock with his nose. Then he stood there and waited. When I didn't respond right away, he did it again. Then he looked at me and growled. It wasn't a mean growl, it was clearly one of frustration. Then he came at me a third time and rather than nudge at my hand again, he head butted me right in the family jewels, turned around and walked away - as if to say "you're of no use to me."

 

Dogs!

Nothing like dog antics. Our labby does nothing but nibble on my pants, I call them passion bites...but my female aussie humps my leg every afternoon when I try to take a nap (tho i've never seen her do this to other folks). Guess it must be a bonding thing.


These two are like night and day...the lab sleeps and the Aussie is go, go, go!

She too is obsessed with squirrels and does the 'what's in that tree' dance. You can't even say the word around her...she goes insane. I have to give her credit for dedication and drive. If she thinks something is in the yard she'll spend hours staring at the door and is gone in a flash the second you open it. She even caught a mouse once.

Her other passion is food...she'll eat pretty much anything including raw onions and cabbage. I've even caught her trying to eat a lemon once. I have to garden in four foot tall boxes cause she'll munch the tomatoes and strawberries right off the bushes.

Her understanding of vocabulary is amazing...she even knows people by name and will 'go find them' if you ask.

 

Now that's funny, I have worked with rhodesian ridgebacks before they are really a beautiful dog. They were bred in Africa to help hunt Lions . They can be stubbord to work with though. I think you would have had a friend for life if you (edit sp) opened the door .

He he, same here. If you actually tap your tongue on the roof of your mouth also works with Shadow

 

Fryman? Are you reading this? More dating tips here...

 

My vet once told me it means she (Senna, at the time) is trying to establish some domination and that's towards other dogs or humans.

Even Zoe, 6 months old, occasionally does so to some of us (she tries).

 

Yikes! That sounds like a very fierce and frightening woman. If I were you, I get a new vet - this one is probably a direct descendant from that party where Adolph and Josef and Saddam all got it on...

 

Our puppy tries to chase cars... when he's in his cage in the back our our car moving at speed down the motorway.

I don't fancy his chances...

 

Not sure why it's turning him on, but the bum thing is usually because his bum glands are full and itching.

Our's tries to have his way with his bed every time we move it. (At the age of 12 weeks!)

 

Oh well when he does it he gets an erection and then sucks his own knob.

Whoever said it's a cats life is sadly mistaken. It's a dogs! I know mine is certainly in his element. Humping male & female dogs, sleep, eat, suck his own dick, sleep, eat, ride the carpet, sleep, eat.

what more could ye want, eh!

 

Anyway, it's a man.

 

Senna is a man?