READ THIS - before visiting Canada!

Now that Vancouver is to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions
people the world over are asking! Believe it or not these questions about Canada
were posted on an International Tourism Website.

Obviously the answers are jokes, and the questions are hilarious; but sadly, the
questions were really asked. (really sad. )


Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?(UK)
A:We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.


Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A:Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A:So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q:It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a
stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A:Let's not touch this one.

Q:Are there any ATM's(cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in
Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A:What did your last slave die of?

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A:A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that
big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday
night in Calgary. Come naked.

Q:Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A:Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send
the rest of the directions.

Q:Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A:Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget
it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in
Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A:No, WE don't stink.

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in
Canada? (USA)
A:Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q:Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is
smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A:Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A:Only at Thanksgiving.

Q:Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A:No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a
kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A:It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone
walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine
before you go out walking.

Q:Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A:Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

 

Brilliant. My 2 favourite questions asked of me by American tourists. I'm not making these up, either.

1. Where is the good skiing to be found?
(Asked by a nice family in the middle of June in Toronto with skiis mounted on the roof rack of their car. The temperature was over 30C {86F})

and

2. I know a doctor from Canada. His name is Bob. Do you know him?
(This one was asked in a bar in Moscow so maybe I can chalk that one up to the alcohol.)

 

few of them are really funny but I think many of them are totally legitimate questions

 

http://azeem.20six.co.uk/barrygeddis

This one is for Australia. Makes that north/south question make a little more sense.

 

Whenever I travel down to the US, people always two questions and the following conversation usually occurs:

US: So you're from Canada?
Me: Yes.
US: I heard it's really cold up there.
Me: Yup, it can get pretty cold.
US: Is it true you live in igloos?
Me: Only in the winter time, in the summer we move to a nearby cave.
US: Really? Whoa...

I've had length discussions with americans that think all Canadians live in igloos...all you can do is laugh.

 

When you cross the 49th parallel, the temperature instantly drops by 50 degrees F.

 

My 3 favorite one... LMAO! Must send these to my family and friends... LOL!

Thanks for the chuckles.

 

hahahaha....! so its true then..