Why is not possible to be nice to people?

It so happened that two travellers were making their way toward the city, both looking to find work and settle there, when, in turn, they met a wise man on the road.

"Tell me,", said the first traveller, "What is yonder city like? I'm moving from my last home because I hated it. The neighbours were mean and grasping, nobody got on and everyone was out to stab you in the back."

"You won't like it there either.", said the wise man, "There too the people are mean and small minded, with everyone looking out for himself", and the first traveller moved on with a heavy heart.

The second man approached and asked, "Tell me about the city up ahead. I'm only relocating because of my work, and I'm dissappointed to have left my previous home. It was such a neighbourly environment where people were open and easy and supported each other come what may."

"You will love it here.", answered the wise man with a smile. "The folk in that city are also kind and warmhearted, generous to a fault. I think you will do just fine."

 

A very wise man indeed!

Are you trying to say it's all about perspectives?

 

Great Post!!!!! Gave me a better outlook on my day, THANK YOU!

 

Hi Weir How's it hangin'?

It's a bit like explaining the punchline of a joke is it not?

But it is more to do with the way we delete distort and generalise our experiences based upon beliefs, values and expectations.

 

Hi Trans. Not going too bad. Spending time here again instead of working.

Okay... maybe shouldn't have asked that lol. I do love these psychological stories though

 

Maybe it means, "You see what you expect to see".

If you think people are genrally angry, cheating, selfish bastards, that's who you see. If you think people are generally decent, goodhearted, generous folk, maybe you will find them instead.

I think in the society of today we need a healthy dose of cynicism but it shouldn't be big or strong enough to inhibit a basic sense of trust in human nature.

On a smaller scale, my mother always taught me to hold the door open for the person behind me. I am often saddened to see a look of surprise and sometimes suspiciousness on the face of the recipient of that tiny gesture.

There used to be a column in the local paper here called, I think, "Brown's Beat" or something -- in contrast to the usual news in the rest of the paper about who assaulted whom and who stole from whom, this was about common everyday little acts of kindness done by ordinary people, often anonymously, without compensation and for no other reason than the person was in a position to do it. Unfortunately, even the column has gone now... but every now and then I try to remind myself that the people the column was written to describe are still around somewhere...

(probably lying in an alley after being mugged but they're still around)

 

Lol I know what you mean Minnie, Jeez it starts to take the piss when You cant even hold a door open for someone without them thinking dodgy shit. I got taught to have manners and be polite. I'm someone that still says Good morning to people I pass in the street, and holds doors open, asks strangers how they are, helps old people with shopping, or if they look like they need help....just because. But boy do I run into some miserable fuckwits. Some of them don't even smile back. It takes less muscle movements to smile than it does to frown. People need to lighten up. I know there are alot of bad people around, but there are also alot of good. I'm 21, and If I say hello to an older citizen they jump in alarm like i'm ready to grab their bag and mug them or something. I'm not a yobbo

 

I don't believe human nature has changed or can change. But the expanding new media offer new opportunities for those at the misanthropic and dishonest end of the spectrum to take advantage of the unwary.

These media also make it much more likely we will learn learn of the scams, cons and schemes that are used by the scoundrels.

On the other end of the spectrum expanding opportunities for education, good connections and kindness offset the bad.

I think the ratio of good to evil people remains more or less constant over the ages but changing conditions bring out different aspects. During the Nazi holocaust many that would have remained ordinary bureaucrats became monsters under pressure.

I think those kinds of pressures (often lesser in magnitude but similar in kind) have more places to be released and neutralized in our current day and situation. I have hope for humanity on a large scale but do acknowledge that evil has always existed on large and small scales. It's just that we hear of it more now because evil is "news" and goodness is not.

Andi

 

I would expect people to be different in the desert than in the city

Would you agree Andi?

 

Andi is a mirage *rubs eyes*

 

Andi has all those links J-Low keeps losing...

But you're right, Andi. That's what I thought was so valuiable about the "Brown's Beat" column... it was a daily reminder that there is kindness as well as malice, even in the city. Sadly, I guess it didn't sell papers the way "Drunken 80-year old midget on pygmy elephant tramples shoppers in mall" did

 

I lived in Thailand - the Land of Smiles - for three years before leaving Asia. Not every Thai smile is a happy smile but the you get the picture. For many people moving to the South of France would be a dream come true. I went there after Thailand and I hated it. Every time I smiled at a stranger, which was all the time, every day, they gave me a look like I was crazed, on the game or after something.

When I made an effort to walk about looking miserable - everybody loved me. Stuff that, I thought. I´m outta here!

Its sad that a smile that costs nothing of any of us has become such a rarity that people think it signals a big fat rip-off in progress.

Hell. This is a depressing thread. Gworld you were right all along.

 

I know what you mean about thailand, it is a wonderful country with friendly people and the nature is just beautiful.
France is just boring and I don't know even how to start to describe the french people, it won't be very polite. To have fun in Europe, you have to go to Germany or Holland, Germans and Dutch know how to live and enjoy life. Italians are fun too.

 

Yep, I've been tro France a few times....not too much fun. Isn't it funny how some stereotypes are so dead-on?

Prague, Austria and Greece (islands) are fun too.

 

Excuse my French but the (majority of..) French SUCK.

I have been to France about 15 times and every single time i've encountered such rude, ignorant, stuck up people. The only thing the French are good for is hosting an invasion.

 

My man was born there though he´s not French by extraction and I have to say yes he does.

 

wtf...e10? you're female!!!!!!? Omg, terribly sorry chick......

 

Yes, I know, got you on another thread.

 

For all the crapiness in the world, I find positive people far outweigh the bad.

When it comes to business and money though you see a lot of evilness. That's just business....there will always be hucksters out to make a quick buck. They don't seem to care about stealing or being respectful. Unless you're handling merchandise the average business owner doesn't think much about shoplifting or spoilage, but having someone steal your intellectual property is very much the same. Being online just makes easier.

Successful businesses also become targets for insecure competitors. I've been threated with law suits more than once when I started my first business. It wasn't anything I did, but for things other people said and/or things they were worried that I MIGHT do in the future. Some companies will just look for any chance they can to get a leg up on you and fear is great tactic for the big guys to slam a startup.

 

There you go doing that again. shhh...

Looks like I found a little gem in this depressing thread. Thanks Mike.